“The perfect search engine would be like the mind of God.”

This blog (with the probable exception of Coye—in fact, that’s mostly the reason why we keep you around, Coye, to smash up the normativity of our assumptions. Or something.) is populated by fans of the range of apps Google has developed and made freely available. I myself use Google’s Gmail, Calendar, Reader, Notebook, Docs and Spreadsheets, oh, and that little-known search engine they cobbled together. Siva Vaidhyanathan is not one of these, and he’s working on a book called The Googlization of Everything: How One Company is Disrupting Culture, Commerce and Community—And Why We Should Worry. An interesting sample:

“The damage Google has done to the world is largely invisible. Google got big by keeping ads small. It carefully avoided pinching our marketing-saturated nervous systems and offered illusions of objectivity, precision, comprehensiveness, and democracy. After all, we are led to believe, Google search results are determined by peer-review, by us, not by an editorial team of geeks. So far, this method has worked wonderfully. Google is the hero of word-of-mouth marketing lore. Google guides me through the open Web, the space that Microsoft does not yet control. Yet Google must get bigger to satisfy its new stockholders. It must go new places and send its spiders crawling through un-indexed corners of human knowledge. Google’s mission statement includes the rather optimistic and humanistic phrase, “to organize the world's information and make it universally accessible and useful.” But Google co-founder Sergey Brin once offered a more ominous description of what Google might become: “The perfect search engine would be like the mind of God.””

[h/t Alan Jacobs]

The Hastert Center

Coye has got us started in this spirit of channeling Dusty in his absence (where are you Dusty, when so many interesting things are happening at our alma mater?), and in just a casual search for something I might contribute to this spate of Wheatoblogging, I discovered a very interesting fact. Do you happen to know the fate of our beloved MSC? The former home of CPO, the Stupe, and various coffee house performances featuring our own Dave Jones as frontman for the AKP is slated to become The J. Dennis Hastert Center for Economics, Government, and Public Policy.

According to the press release, "In recognition of the large number of Wheaton graduates in public service both in Washington, D.C. and at the state level, The J. Dennis Hastert Center for Economics, Government, and Public Policy at Wheaton College will advance the study of market economies and representative democracies, both within the campus community and in the general public. The Hastert Center will affirm the values, institutions, and policy interests that characterize the Honorable J. Dennis Hastert’s career in public life. Specifically, the activities of the Hastert Center and the holder of the Kvamme Chair will uphold the principles and qualities evident in Speaker Hastert’s career as teacher, coach, state legislator, and Member of Congress."

Saga

I know it might seem like a bit much, but this girl I see sometimes heard this on the radio and pointed it out to me tonight, and I couldn't resist adding another item under our shiny new tag:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=14748873

It is, after all, in the byline of our blog's title. Remember student appreciation dinners?

V. Raymond Edman

Here's a news story a friend of mine in the Episcopal seminary here in Austin pointed out to me.

Dusty hasn't given us any Wheaton news of late, so I thoght I'd go ahead and post it.

http://www.suburbanchicagonews.com/couriernews/news/571549,3_1_EL24_A4ANGLICANS_S1.article

Alzheimer’s: Type 3 Diabetes?

I am an avid (even voracious) consumer of news and cultural commentary, much of which is daily delivered to my Google Reader. The upside of this is that I usually know a little bit about a lot of things. Emphasis on a little and a lot, in the right proportions (reverse those positions and you have a dissertation project). The downside is that few things surprise me, and even fewer make me stop everything else I'm doing to pay attention.

This story did just that. There is a growing body of evidence that suggests that Alzheimer's disease has a lot to do with how the brain processes insulin, and that the disease itself may be productively considered as a form of diabetes. Add this to the nearly overwhelming incidence of Type II diabetes among the world's population, which is projected to effect nearly 1/3 of America's population in the next few decades, and you have the most pressing public health crisis of the 21st century.

In case you're too lazy to click the link (you know who you are), a few highlights:

"Now scientists at Northwestern University have discovered why brain insulin signaling -- crucial for memory formation -- would stop working in Alzheimer’s disease. They have shown that a toxic protein found in the brains of individuals with Alzheimer’s removes insulin receptors from nerve cells, rendering those neurons insulin resistant. (The protein, known to attack memory-forming synapses, is called an ADDL for “amyloid ß-derived diffusible ligand.”)

"With other research showing that levels of brain insulin and its related receptors are lower in individuals with Alzheimer’s disease, the Northwestern study sheds light on the emerging idea of Alzheimer’s being a “type 3” diabetes.

"The new findings, published online by the FASEB Journal, could help researchers determine which aspects of existing drugs now used to treat diabetic patients may protect neurons from ADDLs and improve insulin signaling in individuals with Alzheimer’s. (The FASEB Journal is a publication of the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology.)"

Road Rage

Now, I get as annoyed as the next guy when traffic slows down for miles at a toll plaza. Particularly in Chicagoland. But these two took things to a new extreme...

September, September

I think this month will be hard for me for quite some time.

Six years ago. Six years ago I found myself marked, compelled to think and to speak about whatI would prefer to leave in silence. I am afraid to speak, I open my mouth in terror because my words cannot-- words cannot-- even now, here, in this sentence cannot say or be or do what is needed. I would pray for silence, but I am not allowed. I speak in terror, knowing I cannot do what I must. That I must do what I cannot.

Six years ago the eleventh of September was a Tuesday. I remember the English class I had that Tuesday, in the shocked afternoon that followed the clear, terrible morning. I sat in a classroom devoted to words on a day that words cannot approach, a day that words must approach, even when to do so is unholy.

Six years later, tommorrow, I will go to a Tuesday afternoon class devoted to words, once again on the eleventh of September, and I will teach. I was reminded today that most of my students were twelve years old in 2001-- children, only children! What do they remember, what can they remember? How do I stand before them, teaching them language, on the day I would devote to silence?

I sent the final copy of my essay on memorials and the World Trade Center to the Wallace Stevens Journal today, today the tenth of September-- that date sounds almost edenic in its innocence! But my uncle died yesterday, on the ninth, in the quietly unseen space of his own home. Et in Arcadia Ego. And my cousin's long-planned wedding follows hard behind.

The wedding will follow the funeral. My twelve year olds are now in college. I teach and publish and live.

Oh, September

I thought I'd give you fellas a personal update before the craziness that will be my fall semester totally subsumes my life. Unlike the midwest, September in Austin is still very much the summer, so this will be a quick, sweaty email sent from deep in the heart of Texas.

I started teaching a new class in a new department this week. I think it will be good and rewarding, but it's going to be a hell of a lot of work. [profanity used advisedly] I'm sort of writing the syllabus as I go along, so there's a certain seat of the pants uneasiness that I'm trying to turn into some sort of thrilling ride. I'll let you know how things go on that front.

I met two girls this week. Well, one I had chatted up several months ago and then lost track of, and she turned up again when I went for a drink with a friend of mine. The other I'd been wanting to talk to at cafe I frequent, and she showed up at a random party that another friend's roommate talked us into going to. Anyways, I guess I'm pulling that whole resilient, "get back on the horse" thing. It's either very brave or very stupid... but you've gotta try, right?

I also moved into a house with a roommate, so my old address is bad and you'll need to get my new one from me if you need it. Redundant, I know. I'd like to leave you all by pointing out that my city is better than everywhere the rest of you live, so you might as well come visit me. But not on September 17th: I'll be watching Bob Dylan play in Zilker Park that night. Bon nuit.

Lost email addresses

Hi, those who still read this. My laptop died, and it was the sold depository that I had for many of your email addresses. Please email me at my usual address at either yahoo.com or gmail.com so that I can reach you be email.

Thanks!

New city. New job?

Hi everyone (Dave, Coye, Andy, and anybody else who still reads this thing),

How is everybody? I'm breaking radio silence, because I now have a job offer in the Chicago area. And I would like prayer as to whether or not I should take it. For those of you not aware of the situation. My job in DC ends this upcoming Friday, and I'm moving to Chicago whether I have a job to start or not. I have not been as active in job searching as I wish I would have been, yet I have a job offer from a firm that does fixed-income investment software. The job sounds fairly interesting, but I'm not sure what my next step career-wise would be if I ever left it, and the commute would be over an hour long if I want to live close to Kari (my girlfriend), which is the biggest tangible reason that I'm moving out there. Prayers for wisdom, guidance, and a sense of God's will is appreciated. I'm thinking that I should maybe hold out for something more econ related with a shorter commute, but I'm unsure.

Peace.

Question about George Lakoff's Metaphors

Has anyone else read part or the whole of Lakoff's Metaphors we Live By? I remember the portions I read at Wheaton struck a chord with me, the overtones of which have never quite ceased ringing in my ears. So I've decided to go back and look at the thing again and then to try to see where it sits vis the contemporary linguistic/psychological/sociological field today. If anyone's interested in talking about it or reading it with me, that'd be awesome. Otherwise, perhaps some of you could at least tell me if they've heard anything about how Lakoff is read these days. Is he, as one Michael J Edelman (a reviewer on Amazon) claims, "the aging bad boy of structural linguistics," who has unsuccessfully tried to "recast himself in the role of a social theorist" trying to force his linguistic methodology into a new field? [1] Or is the book to be "considered to be one of the most intellectually honest of any book in print, for it unashamedly deals with commonsense notions of how the human mind deals with the world" [Carlson]? Do these somewhat pedestrian analysis equally miss the mark?

Anyway, I'm interested in understanding a bit more about the way we as humans understand the world around us via metaphor (or even if metaphor is the best way to talk about the way we understand and operate socially).

Hemingway: "The Gambler, the Nun, and the Radio"

"Religion is the opium of the people. He believed that, that dyspeptic little joint-keeper. Yes, and music is the opium of the people. Old mount-to-the-head hadn't thought of that. And now economics is the opium of the people; along with patriotism the opium of the people in Italy and Germany. What about sexual intercourse; was that an opium of the people? Of some of the people. Of some of the best of the people. But drink was a sovereign opium of the people, oh, an excellent opium. Although some prefer the radio, another opium of the people, a cheap one he had just been using. Along with these went gambling, an opium of the people if there ever was one, one of the oldest. Ambition was another, an opium of the people, along with a belief in any new form of government. What you wanted was the minimum of government, always less government. Liberty, what we believed in, now the name of a MacFadden publication. We believed in that although they had not found a new name for it yet. But what was the real one? What was the real, the actual, opium of the people? He knew it very well. It was gone just a little way around the corner in that well-lighted part of his mind that was there after two or more drinks in the evening; that he knew was there (it was not really there of course). What was it? He knew very well. What was it? Of course; bread was the opium of the people. Would he remember that and would it make sense in the daylight? Bread is the opium of the people."

Inflammatory Idea of the Week

Hopefully not too inflammatory.

I decided I'd like to know who, if anyone, you guys find interesting out of the field of presidential candidates and, if anyone looks worth voting for in a way more substatial than "at least they're not...", why you find them interesting. This is, of course, just preliminary thoughts about people we won't be voting for or against for months, but I thought it would be interesting to hear what you guys think. That's how democracy is supposed to work, right? Citizens discussing their leaders in the common marketplace of ideas and all that. And since we already fight about religion, why not add politics to the mix. (It would also be a special treat for me and Andy who otherwise only see Republicans on TV or occasionally in business class when we get on airplanes.) We live in the most powerful country ever; we should be doing this kind of thing.

If you don't have any favorites at the moment, what are the factors that will determine who you vote for (or against). What do you care most about in an administration? (This really kind of sounds like an online dating survey, doesn't it?)

Crazy Idea of the Week

In classic Jonesian form, I bring you [dum da da dum]: Crazy Idea of the Week! (Coye, you're right, that font would be super sweet). As such, you can expect never to see [dum da da dumb] Crazy Idea of the Week! again; and if again, then perhaps again in a year and a half.

So without further ado, I bring you [dum da da...forget it]:
Ok, have you guys seen the current trend of video blogs popping up around cyberspace? Of particular note are Rocketboom and Mobuzz, though these both only represent a sliver of the possibilities behind the medium. Well, I was thinking how fun it would be to try our collective hand at writing and producing a little video blog of our own. What would it be and how would it be structured? I haven't a clue, but it is a crazy idea of the week, thus, this has been, [dum da da dum]Daaaaaave's Crazy Idea of the Week! [buy all our play-sets and toys!]

An Ex-Parrot?

So, inspired by Dave's latest poll (which I seem to be the only one to have voted on... even Andy is awol, apparently), I thought I'd make a little poll-like inquiry myself. Since I lack Dave's omnipotent administrative powers, this will have to be in the form of a post rather than a nifty bar graph in the margins. I take it from the occasional bursts of responses that pop up on the blog that there are still a lot of guys who check it out at least semi-regularly. So why no posts? Why such seldom comments? Is it a matter of boredom with the blog or wanting to disassociate yourselves from Coye and TEFKAMS or general bridge burning or what? Is there anything that would actually spark some renewed interest in it? More personal updates, book discussions, sociopolitical discussions, cake recipies, popular inventions, cheat codes for Metroid, the Cheat, more TEFKAMS, less TEFKAMS, more screaming in TEFKAMS posts, more inanity, less inanity, more discussions of inanity, more ex-parrots, what? Because we could just rename it "The Dave, Coye and Andy Show" but I know that the three of us don't want it to go that way. These are your friends, here, and we'd really like to hear from you. Something.

archival research and restitution

TEFKAMS said... AAAHHHH! Once my friends, long, long ago, I decided to tell you the story of my humble origins. It was an emotional story of a boy, looking for love and acceptance, who was chewed up and spit out by the cruel, cruel soul-killing machine that we call the Hollywood establishment. It was a heartrending tale, and one that I had never told. To anyone. Ever. But I once found kindness and acceptance in the halls of Traber 6, and so I shared my story and narrated how I came to be the Mr. Satan you knew and… tolerated. I was so young, so naïve.

To my chagrin and astonishment, my story did not reach sympathetic ears (or eyes, I suppose) on T611, but instead was eviscerated and torn from these pages. Dear reader, I was stripped of my voice and my dignity that day. Without a warning, without an explanation, I became the only contributor to ever have my words expunged from the blog. Flung into the ether, as if they never were. Chastened, I protested my lost voice by also giving up my name. I became TEFKAMS.

And there was nothing offensive about my posting. It was actually rather clever and amusing, if I must say so myself (and I must, since you can no longer go back and read it for yourself). So, why, I ask myself, is a posting that offends and alienates the readers here (by design, it would seem) afforded so much better treatment? Warnings. Time for consideration. I was never given any of these things. And no post of mine caused people to leave our community (except Mr. Satan, of course). AAAAHHHHH!!!

I am a fan of posting on the blog (and I’d like to see more of you write, too!) and I am as big a proponent of artistic freedom as the next disembodied entity. But if there needs to be a line drawn to distinguish acceptable content on our site, this photo helps us to see where that line might be.

AAAAHHHH!!

So, about that Einstein Fellow...

Steve came up with this fantastic idea to read some Einstein this summer and talk about relativity—that enormously interesting idea which, along with the quantum mechanics of the ensuing decades, shaped what has come to be known as the century of physics. But he followed that great idea up with a rather dumb one: outsourcing the implementation of the project to me. It has sat as a task on my iGoogle todo list for a couple of weeks with no action on my part. Sorry for dropping the ball.

But now that Steve is back from vacation (the pictures were great, by the way), and Dave should be back from Maine this weekend, and I’m still where I always am, it might be a good time to turn our attention back to Dr. Einstein. As they say, there’s no time like the present.

If you’ve forgotten, Steve provided these great links to the 1920 English translation of Einstein’s 1916 book Relativity: The Special and the General Theory: MS Word format, MP3 files, or Podcast. Or you could go to your local library.

Einstein wrote of this book in 1916 that "the present book is intended, as far as possible, to give an exact insight into the theory of Relativity to those readers who, from a general scientific and philosophical point of view, are interested in the theory, but who are not conversant with the mathematical apparatus of theoretical physics.... In the interest of clearness, it appeared to me inevitable that I should repeat myself frequently, without paying the slightest attention to the elegance of the presentation. I adhered scrupulously to the precept of that brilliant theoretical physicist L. Boltzmann, according to whom matters of elegance ought to be left to the tailor and to the cobbler."

For those who are interested—and several of us have expressed some interest in this endeavor—perhaps we could spend two weeks or so on part one of the book, which encompasses the special theory from 1905, before moving on to the more comprehensive general theory that Einstein finished in 1916. Please post comments, questions, reactions, connections to other things you know in science and/or culture and history. I'll leave it to you whether we want to make observations as separate posts with comments in response, or a big, long comments thread. I don’t want to make this really formal, but I also know from experience that without some sort of framework this discussion won’t have the traction it needs. So start reading, and we’ll talk more over the next couple of weeks about Herr Einstein and his world-changing theories.

Marvin K. Mooney

I'm currently in Amarillo, staying with my folks, and I saw a Dr. Seuss book here that I bought for my niece a few years ago. The book reminded me of a quasi-parody (Geisel helped write it himself) that Art Buchwald published in the Washington Post in 1974. I will refrain from parodying the parody myself, but it would be fair to say that it reminded me of another prominent middle initial...

Richard M. Nixon Will You Please Go Now!

Memory Application Beta almost there

Hey fellas. Check out the memory application I talked about a few comments ago. Now it integrates full ESV text using my special sauce. Single click a paragraph to get scrollable text up top, double-click to see the full text of the paragraph all together. Romans 1-8 is up there as a beta. I'm hoping to talk to the ESV online folks to see if they'd want to take this thing any further with me.

If you're at all into memorizing scripture, test this out and see if it helps. any suggestions are welcomed.

enjoying a vacation in Maine-- dave

OK, I couldn't resist...

There's a pretty good chance that this will just amuse Steve and Adam, but that's worth something in my book. You might remember in college that the Star Wars Gangsta Rap started as an audio file, and then someone found it on the internet with the addition of some pretty lame animation. Well, now the animation is much better. Wait for the Storm Troopers raising the roof toward the end. It's worth it.

On this day in history...

In 1960 the Ohio Art Company took Arthur Granjean's invention--which consisted of a couple knobs, some aluminium, and a plastic screen--and turned it into the Etch-A-Sketch. Suffice it to say that the guy that drew this puts the sad little doodles of my childhood to shame.

I'm Speechless... in a good way

It did not give of bird or bush

So I have what probably qualifies as a mandatory update announcement:

I just got an email from the editor of the Wallace Stevens Journal, and they are publishing my article on Stevens, memorialization and the World Trade Center. It's not the largest journal, but publication counts as a major career milestone in the humanities, so I thought I should share it with you guys. The earliest it would be out will be Spring 2008, but I could (today, if I wanted) start putting it down as a "forthcoming" publication on my CV.

And I am still up 2-0 against Andy in the frolf books. That particular poison wasn't a banned substance until AFTER the match; it was totally legal at the time.

Bloomsday in Three Acts. By TEFKAMS. Act III.

The following day, what event captured the attention of this rabble?

Media Beckett.

Why was the group drawn to this particular event?

A girl. Of course.

And what illustrious literary figure was in attendance?

Paul Muldoon.

For what reason did said poet attend?

Unknown.

Did any conversation take place between him and our heroes?

Mr. Muldoon enjoined Andy to wake him if he should fall asleep, as the room was dim.

Andy’s reply?

Affirmative.

Were other visages visible, more or less famous than the august Irish poet?

Portraitures of former Texas governors, among them our current emporer, GWB.

What was the reaction of those assembled to this portrait?

Variously: consternation, amusement, horror.

At the close of the panel, did the girl whose presence had drawn them together continue to occupy Andy, Coye and TEFKAMS throughout the evening?

Indeed.

What allusions were made regarding the woman desired?

Andy: Ahab chasing his white whale.

What machinations did Coye engineer for the purpose of securing precious moments with the girl?

Cell phone messages left on the bat bridge.

Parking space sought endlessly.

Birthday bash crashed to no avail.

More cell phone messages.

More searching for parking.

For what reason did he meditate on schemes so difficult of realisation?

It was one or his axioms that similar meditations or the automatic relation to himself of a narrative concerning himself or tranquil recollection of the past when practised habitually before retiring for the night alleviated fatigue and produced as a result sound repose and renovated vitality.

Alone, what did Coye feel?

The cold of interstellar space, thousands of degrees below freezing point or the absolute zero of Fahrenheit, Centigrade or Réaumur: the incipient intimations of proximate dawn.

And then, what did Coye hear?

The double reverberation of retreating feet on the heavenborn earth, the double vibration of a cell phone harp in the resonant lane.

What was his response?

Joy. Elation. Terror.

Was Ahab able to find the object of his obsession?

Yes.

Bloomsday in Three Acts. By TEFKAMS. Act II.

Upon waking, what did TEFKAMS do?

Woke Andy, who finished editing paper and saved several redundant copies for eventual transfer from digital to material storage.

And Coye?

Also awoke. Consulted bus schedule. Orchestrated transportation to campus. Provided English department printing resources. Entertained the trio with various stories, academic and otherwise.

Were TEFKAMS and Andy able to register for the conference?

No. Andy was the only official conference participant.

What was TEFKAMS reaction upon hearing this news?

Negligible.

Which of the three carried out the duty of presenting research and ideas?

Andy.

Was his performance successful?

Yes. The assembled host neither fell asleep, nor asked questions designed to discredit the answerer.

Were each of the panelists as successful?

No. The second of the series of presenters was asked a simple question, supportive of her argument. She proceeded to admit, little by little, that her ideas about FW sprang from her own (ordinary) family upbringing, and that everyone should have experienced the same sort of childhood. She spoke on and on, digging deeper and deeper into a quagmire of her own making, at one point loudly shouting out: “let me impose my normativity on you!” (Imposing one’s normativity on anyone, as you might guess, is frowned upon in academic circles.)

How did the trio react?

Andy: tried to keep eyes from bulging noticeably. Shook head in dismay, then settled back to enjoy the show.

Coye: doodled with abandon.

TEFKAMS: jumped up on the presenters’ table and performed a jig of extraordinary exuberance and volume.

What lessons did each derive from the experience?

Coye: bring more pens for doodling.

Andy: never read Finnegans Wake.

TEFKAMS: If people already suspect you are a fool (on account of reading FW), be not quick to open your mouth, lest you prove them right.

What transpired after the close of the panel?

Coye left TEFKAMS and Andy to their own devices. The pair attended more conference sessions, partook of lunch.

How did they take leave, one of the other, in separation?

Standing perpendicular at the same door and on different sides of its base, the lines of their valedictory arms, meeting at any point and forming any angle less than the sum of two right angles.

What sound accompanied the union of their tangent, the disunion of their (respectively) centrifugal and centripetal hands?

The sound of the peal of the hour of the day by the chime of the bells in the Austin tower.

And then?

Coye faced Andy for a riotous game of frolf, which included fording a stream, freeclimbing a rock wall, and dodging the discs of impaired players.

Who won this battle of wits and skill?

Andy.

Was it not Coye who emerged victorious?

He did, but his nefarious plot was later revealed and his victory annulled by the 611 College Town Frolf Gaming Board Rules Committee.

By what machinations did Coye unduly intervene in the fair play of the match?

Laced Andy’s disc with a poisonous pigment that steadily weakened this clearly-superior player even as it dyed his hands an unnatural hue.

Was this scheme efficacious?

It was. Andy’s commanding lead was suddenly sundered as the carcinogen was absorbed.

What took place after this disputed contest?

The two prepared for two-stepping at the broken spur.

Where was TEFKAMS?

The narrator has chosen to redact his activities of that afternoon.

What play of forces, inducing inertia, rendered departure undesirable for Andy?

The lateness of the hour, rendering procrastinatory: the obscurity of the night, rendering invisible: the uncertainty of thoroughfares, rendering perilous: the necessity for repose, obviating movement: the proximity of an occupied bed, obviating research.

What reason did Andy give for declining Coye’s offer of dancing with Joyceans?

That he was a danceaphobe, hating partial contact by immersion or total by submersion into the metaphorical streams of gyrating humanity. Also that he was quite tired.

Bloomsday in Three Acts. By TEFKAMS. Act I.

By what means did TEFKAMS find himself embracing urban life in the nation’s tenth healthiest city on Bloomsday?

Commercial hyperterrestrial conveyance by way of Detroit, Boston, Detroit, Bloomington, Indianpolis, Dallas, Austin.

What action did TEFKAMS make on his arrival at his destination?

Saluted his host. Proceeded to the golden city, wherein was housed the earthly belongings of the same.

What discrete succession of images did Coye meanwhile perceive?

TEFKAMS struggle with Andy for dominance. Andy’s defeat. Disturbing release of psychological effluvia.

What supererogatory marks of special hospitality did the host show his guest?

Relinquishing his symposiarchal right to the living room couch presented to him by his only parents. He substituted the old white wicker chair from his dorm room days at Wheaton. A dollar here or there. Removing his iron from the neither reaches of his closet.

Was the guest conscious of and did he acknowledge these marks of hospitality?

His attention was directed to them by his host jocosely and he accepted them seriously as they made libations at the house of spiders.

What two temperaments did they individually represent?

The Bacchanalian. The Apollonian.

From which (if any) of these mental or physical disorders was the host not totally immune?

From hypnotic suggestion: once, waking, he had not recognized his sleeping apartment: more than once, waking, he had been for an indefinite time incapable of moving or uttering sounds.

After partaking of liquid refreshment, what action was undertaken by the pair?

Boarded Coye’s Mustang for an aggressive return to his domicile.

What did each do at the door of egress?

Coye unlocked the door. TEFKAMS turned on the light.

For what creature was the door of egress a door of ingress?

For a spider and sundry microbes.

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S RIDDLE (for Dave)

ARE YOU IN THE TOP 2% OF INTELLIGENT PEOPLE IN THE WORLD? SOLVE THE RIDDLE AND FIND OUT.

There are no tricks, just pure logic, so good luck and don't give up.

1. In a street there are five houses, painted five different colours.
2. In each house lives a person of different nationality
3. These five homeowners each drink a different kind of beverage, smoke different brand of cigar and keep a different pet.

THE QUESTION: WHO OWNS THE FISH?

HINTS

1. The Brit lives in a red house.
2. The Swede keeps dogs as pets.
3. The Dane drinks tea.
4. The Green house is next to, and on the left of the White house.
5. The owner of the Green house drinks coffee.
6. The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds.
7. The owner of the Yellow house smokes Dunhill.
8. The man living in the centre house drinks milk.
9. The Norwegian lives in the first house.
10. The man who smokes Blends lives next to the one who keeps cats.
11. The man who keeps horses lives next to the man who smokes Dunhill.
12. The man who smokes Blue Master drinks beer.
13. The German smokes Prince.
14. The Norwegian lives next to the blue house.
15. The man who smokes Blends has a neighbour who drinks water.

ALBERT EINSTEIN WROTE THIS RIDDLE EARLY DURING THE 20th CENTURY. HE SAID THAT 98% OF THE WORLD POPULATION WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO SOLVE IT.

Traber 611 World Frolf Championship Circuit

I had the pleasure of hosting Andy and TEFKAMS in Austin last week (Andy, at least, came for the North American James Joyce conference... I'm not really sure what TEFKAMS was doing here). I think that either one of them could vouch for the comfortableness of my couch and the timeliness of my airport chauffering, in case anyone else might be contemplaing a trip down to bat city for a conference or music festival. The bats, unfortunately, were not as punctual. In fact, they absolutely refused to come out from under the Congress Avenue bridge on Friday night (all 2.5 million of them having a good laugh at all the humans standing around on the bridge for nothing), so we got to stand around with a bunch of strangers and think of all the things we could drop on the boats floating beneath us-- a good time, yes, but not what we set out for that evening. Fortunately, the Blues Allstars are always on top of their game, and we got to hear a very nice set from them at the Continental Club. Good times were had by all.

Now, for the title piece: I once again came out victorious over Andy in our multi-city disc golf competition (known to lovers of silly words as frolf). Andy played a remarkable thirteen holes and led the entire game up to hole fourteen, at which point he self-destructed and I was able-- with some rather skillful tosses-- to recover from the sizable gap created by my erratic play and win with a respectable five stroke lead. That makes the series record Coye 2, Andy 0. He claims that I poisoned his frisbee with a toxic yellow dye that only took effect on the back nine, but such claims are ludicrous, libellous and should be referred to the governing body of the 611 College Town Frolf Gaming Board Rules Committee. If anything poisoned Andy, it was his unprecedented proximity to so much Finnegan's Wake during Friday morning and afternoon. We saw firsthand how the Wake can cause spontaneous self-destruction (an unfortunate question and answer session, to say the least).

The tasty burritos enjoyed by all, the two-stepping skipped out on by Andy, the coffee drank, the women chased, the parking spaces sought endlessly-- all of this must, unfortunately, be left out of the current post (I still have several pages of French grammar to read through tonight), but, needless to say, it was all great. Nous avions un bon temp.

Adieu, mes amis.

Continuing From Andy's Book Idea...

I figured since Andy's book post is so far down the page, no one would see any comments I left there, so I'm continuing the discussion anew here.

I say we all try to wrap our minds around Einstein's Special and General Theories of Relativity. So I propose we read a book he wrote, called "Relativity: The Special and General Theory". An excerpt from the intro:

"The present book is intended, as far as possible, to give an exact insight into the theory of Relativity to those readers who, from a general scientific and philosophical point of view, are interested in the theory, but who are not conversant with the mathematical apparatus of theoretical physics. The work presumes a standard of education corresponding to that of a university matriculation examination, and, despite the shortness of the book, a fair amount of patience and force of will on the part of the reader."

You can get it as MS Word format, MP3 files, or Podcast. Or go to your local library.
(btw, www.librivox.org has REALLY taken off. Their catalogue of audio books is really growing fast now. George MacDonald, Father Brown mysteries, Robin Hood,...great if you have an ipod)

I finally got a new room key

It appears someone changed the lock on my door here at 611. I had to go to ... (oh crap I'm trying to continue the analogy between Wheaton and Blogger, but I've forgotten the name of the division at Wheaton that takes care of stuff like making keys and mowing lawns. Was it Physical Services? I forgot! Well after all, it has been 4 years!) ...I had to go to Physical Services, and it took forever for them even to recognize that I was waiting there. But now I have my key, and am back in business.

(in other words, when we switched to new blogger, i wasn't able to get an account for a long time, but now I'm all good).

Facebook

So I took Dusty's advice and started looking for friends on Facebook. Up 'til now, Facebook has been a voyeuristic entity for me--a way for me to keep tabs on my students and find out if they were saying anything about me or my class. (Apparently I am not interesting enough to warant a Facebook group... at least not yet.) Fun, but I didn't really get the point.

But I took the plunge, and started asking people to be my friend. And Dusty's right--there are a lot of long lost people out there. The greatest find, so far, has been Rudy. That's right, Rudy is alive, and he became my Facebook friend. Not bad.

That is all.

DD

DD...you had better share the news with us....

BTW T6, if you do not have a facebook yet, you really should get one. You are definitely missing out on the huge gathering of many people we know, including long lost people from 2E / 1S.

Dave Update

For the one or two of you still reading this, here's a little update on the expanding jonesian world here in South Hamilton, MA.

mayTen: Isaac David Jones was pulled by the headSholdersAndTorso into this world by Eva, a midwife at Beverly Hospital ten minutes before two o'clock. We got to hold him too; and take him home with us. Ha! Crazy. Since then it's been the kind of go-go-go you feel when you're in the passenger seat of the car, and you're already ten minutes late to a meeting you don't want to screw up. So it's been hard to sit down and write because writing usually calls out for some sort of settledness vis. one's subject. Yet here, even in theory I don't have the mental capacity to settle down around any subject, much less around the subject who just woke up screaming since Andrew is crying because he doesn't want to go to bed because his grandparents and his aunt are here with their computers, their projects, their conversations and their help. No longer mayTen, I know, but how did I get here? Crazy. But beautiful; Isaac is startlingly beautiful because he is here, and because he is my son, and because his head is so incredibly small and well defined that he looks like he is a shrunken 900-year-old man who glowers around the room with his strange expressions.

mayFourteen-mayEighteen: Even though she knows I am an new father, my boss scheduled me to open the coffee shop every day this week. That is, to get up at five-fifty AM after a night of waking up between sleeping. It's bearable for two reasons. First, I know I won't die on the job: I've already passed through the gauntlet of the worst-possible-scenario-actually-happening (i.e. there by myself, ten customer-deep waiting line of impatient stares, wrap order, frappe order, "oh, can you make that two wraps?" and then the register runs out of paper without warning (rendering it useless until the paper is changed)) and didn't die. Two, because I know I won't be working there past the summer. In fact, I have managed to secure a web-development contract (retainer based) with my brother-in-law's branding company in Cambridge, MA. So it's bearable.

mayFifteen- the house my Grandmother gave sold. This is good news because it means I am no longer in debt; though it won't pay off all of next year because the house is in Eureka, Kansas, and who wants to live in Eureka, Kansas? Exactly. So we didn't get very much, but what we got helps.

maySixteen- As I mentioned, I was able to get initial agreement toward a contract with Soldier Design, a branding company in Harvard Square. I am now cramming my head with as much knowledge of PHP and MySQL as possible so that I can begin building database-driven websites. I've gotten pretty good at Flash since I began contract-to-contract work (mainly writing actionscript in flash) and I've done a number of sites and components for Soldier Design with this. The contract will give me a fifteen-hour-per-week retainer so I can quit my other jobs and focus on web development as my sole source of income (which is very very nice).

OK, we're going to watch dream girls now. Maybe I'll add more in the comments soon, depending if anyone signals that they actually read this!

finis

Today I finished the requirements for the Master of Arts degree at the Univeristy of Texas at Austin. I guess it requires some stamping and filing before its officially official, but I'm pretty much a master of the univers(ity). I can feel the power flowing through my veins. Andy, why didn't you tell me about the power. It's incredible. It's intoxicating. I feel... just capital.

I also started looking for a different place to live. All this power can't fit in an apartment anymore, so I'm trying to find a house to rent. I'll need a roommate or two to pull it off, but I'm sure that with all this power I should be able to persuade someone to pick up part of my rent.

I shot a roll of film this afternoon, so I might have some cool Austin pics to post in the near future. We need some more pictures up that aren't of me in a skirt. In the meantime, I'm out, Reno style!

breaking and entering

So someone broke into my car today. I have a case number and everything. The cops took fingerprints. Which I find hilarious. I don't know what they thought they were going to steal. They didn't even take my Altoids. Or the sweatshirt in the back seat. I think they might have been after my ice scraper. But I fooled them. I always keep it in the trunk.

I turned in the master's report yesterday, which is splendid. Sort of had my heart broken the day before, which isn't. No worries. A few days, a few more pages written, and I can seek the heavenly bliss of oblivion. Consciousness. Burden. uhg

Summer Book?

So here's an idea: since we seem to be struggling to find topics that capture our collective attention, and given the fact that academic semesters are drawing to a close in the next couple of weeks, is anyone interested in selecting a book of general interest (theology, ethics, politics, etc.) that we can read together and discuss this summer? We could agree to read a couple of chapers a week (or whatever seems feasible), and post responses, questions, observations--all that good stuff. Even if only a few of us do it, it might be a nice way to transition us from a current events/anything that strikes our fancy format (which seems to be struggling) to one that is more organized and content- and discussion-rich. Clearly, I'm in. Any other takers? If so, what books do you suggest?

Chairman

I thought I'd let everyone know that my former roommate, the Chairman, will be living in Los Angeles and attending UCLA this coming fall. It looks like a very good gig for him since his brother is already living in So Cal and they can share an appartment, etc, etc. We should really try to get him to post his own updates now that he isn't in the PRC. I'll work on it.

Goodbye

Hi friends, the time has come for me to spend a semester off of the floor. My attempts to start a doctoral program this fall did not pan out, and I will be starting a job search as soon as I can find some free time. I am removing myself from the online community soon since it might hamper my job search. I thought I might not have to take this step, but the most recent prior post made my decision an easy one.

To everyone, I wish you the best. Given what I know of a few dating relationships, I am hopeful to be reunited with some of you in 2008 for a wedding or two or three. Thanks to everyone who has contributed to this blog. I have a lot of good memories - the P, WC, and MK cards; Logey's house on fire; our mission for Greenspan; naming Dave's child (good final choice); the personal updates; I could go on. Please pray for my job search. Keep centered on Christ.

Grace and peace, Strauss

My contact info is available through the college's alumni website except the email address is yahoo or verizon.net, not juno. I will likely continue reading the blog.

fishing

this should get a response

YHWH

Since it is the season of lent, we said the decalogue during the liturgy this morning. The third commandment is translated like this: "Thou shalt not invoke with malice the name of the Lord thy God." (The answer, of course, is "Amen. Lord have mercy.") Now, my fundigelical upbringing ingrained it into my head that the third commandment (always given as not taking the Lord's name in vain) means essentially "don't curse, don't use profanity" (or, since I was raised in west Texas, "don't cuss" would be more verbatim). Invoking God's name with malice sounds like something quite different. It sounds more like, "We need to make sure that homosexuals can't get married in this country because God said marriage is a man and a woman." It sounds, in short, like using God's name as an excuse to follow your malicious heart and not welcome your neighbor. Less an arbitrary restriction of personal piety and more the royal law of love that commands love your enemy, welcome the alien, I have washed your feet (next Thursday) go and do likewise. Just a thought, but a hospitable thought.

The Importance of State's Rights

You might recall that last year an international group of astronomers concluded that our solar system does not have nine planets as was previously thought, but eight, plus a whole bunch of sub-planetary detrius floating around. This was particularly bad news for the space-object-formerly-known-as-Pluto (SOFKAP), which was reclassified by this body of astronomers as nothing more than a big rock and is no longer considered a planet. My very educated mother just served us nine pizzas, indeed!

For concerned fans of the planet Pluto, it seemed that nothing could be done to save the little fellow from demotion. Science had spoken. All was lost.

Until now. The state of New Mexico, in a courageous assertion of state's rights, has decided to thwart scientific opinion by recognizing Pluto as a planet while SOFKAP is in its jurisdiction. Forget gay marriage-- if the New Mexican legislature has its way, the SOFKAP scandal will become the biggest issue in state's rights for a long time to come. As the Las Cruces Sun-News reports, "Under a measure approved by the House on Tuesday, Pluto will regain its status as a planet as it passes through New Mexico skies. The joint memorial also declared March 13 as "Pluto Planet Day."" That's right, whenever SOFKAP, the little planet that could, finds itself over the New Mexican skies, it can hold its head up high, a planet once again. And I, for one, am glad that New Mexico has taken a position on this issue. When will other states, or even the federal government, stop wasting time with absolutely pointless legislation and get on with the important work of governing? Thanks to New Mexico, planets of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth. Bravo!

Living on a Prayer

So I'm watching George Mason play in the Colonial Athletic Association basketball final. If they win, GMU gets to dance again. It's fun being a student at a D1 school. As for further school, I still don't know if I get to go on for more school. Hopefully, I will know soon.

Happy Birthday, Steve!

Happy Birthday, Stephen!

As you creep ever closer to your late twenties, keep in mind some of the people who died at twenty-seven (Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain) and get everything you can out of twenty-six. Suck life from the marrow bones.

Sake wa doko desko.


and then there's this...

Believing Scripture but Playing by Science's Rules

Today’s New York Times has an interesting article about Marcus Ross, a paleontologist who earned his degree at the University of Rhode Island, Believing Scripture but Playing by Science’s Rules. There’s nothing particularly interesting about his dissertation (at least to me), but what is generating some controversy is his methodology—you see, he wrote a perfectly normal thesis about paleontology, separated from his religious beliefs. Or, as the NYT tagline puts it: “As a paleontologist and a creationist, Marcus R. Ross has produced academic work that contradicts his own beliefs.” I wonder if this article raises any thoughts for us about the ethics of positioning ourselves in academic discourses, of “passing,” to borrow a term from critical race studies, in order to get degrees, jobs, grants, promotions, etc. when we know that full disclosure (i.e. “I graduated from Wheaton College”) would be, as they say, the kiss of death.

Some excerpts:

“Dr. Ross is hardly a conventional paleontologist. He is a “young earth creationist” — he believes that the Bible is a literally true account of the creation of the universe, and that the earth is at most 10,000 years old.

“For him, Dr. Ross said, the methods and theories of paleontology are one “paradigm” for studying the past, and Scripture is another. In the paleontological paradigm, he said, the dates in his dissertation are entirely appropriate. The fact that as a young earth creationist he has a different view just means, he said, “that I am separating the different paradigms.”

“He likened his situation to that of a socialist studying economics in a department with a supply-side bent. “People hold all sorts of opinions different from the department in which they graduate,” he said. “What’s that to anybody else?””

from Tyler

Hey, who wants to go canoeing?

The coolest thing EVER!

You must see this skateboarding bulldog! I'll never be half this cool.

Traber611 Online is dead! Long live Traber611 Online!

Wow. This new format looks great. It's almost as good looking as... oh, never mind. You guys wouldn't want to hear about that sort of thing.

Aeijtzsche Update

Well, Coye sort of asked how I was doing in another thread, so I thought I'd do an official update.

As many of you may or may not know/remember, last April I moved from Grand Rapids to Los Angeles to start working with a small company that handled the Beach Boys archival library. All was well for a time, and getting to know the culture of LA has been fun. What kind of place is this? It's like another country in some ways, or perhaps another universe. For instance, the phrase "no, you can't bring your dog in here" is not understood by naitive Angelinos. A mile in the rest of the country is equal to roughly 2.7 miles here when using powered transportation. People don't understand the concept of "snow".

On the other hand, LA is a place like any other, with lots of completely regular people and such.

It ended up being kind of a tough experience for me in the end now, about a month before Christmas, it became apparent that the company I was working for was about to break up. And, just after the new year, the company formally split up and became a non-entity, and I essentially lost my job, though I still am on call for the occasional errand from my former bosses.

All of that kind of took the wind out of my sails. I don't really feel like living here anymore. I like the area a lot in terms of geography and weather and interest, but I just don't want to be here right now.

I sold some guitars and am living off of the money from those sales. Contemplating my next move. As much as I dislike academia (sorry, Dr. everybody) I'm pretty close to trying to get some degrees and some qualifications. One problem with that is I still don't really have any idea what I want to do with my life, making any sort of specific pursuit difficult to choose.

Anyway, I think I may return to Grand Rapids for a while, do some music-related recording, and whatnot. We'll see.

Any of you DC guys know somebody in the FBI? I wouldn't mind being an elite special agent if somebody could hook that up.

Peace out.

Wilfred Owen

The Parable of the Old Man and the Young

So Abram rose, and clave the wood, and went,
And took the fire with him, and a knife.
And as they sojourned both of them together,
Isaac the first-born spake and said, My Father,
Behold the preparations, fire and iron,
But where the lamb for this burnt-offering?
Then Abram bound the youth with belts and straps,
And builded parapets and trenches there,
And stretchèd forth the knife to slay his son.
When lo! an Angel called him out of heaven,
Saying, Lay not thy hand upon the lad,
Neither do anything to him. Behold,
A ram caught in a thicket by its horns;
Offer the Ram of Pride instead of him.
But the old man would not so, but slew his son...

The DC Informant

Sometimes, people seem to forget that there is a T6 enclave here in DC (among all of the talk of reestablishing a physical T6 community). I'm going to take the liberty of providing a post Morehouse wedding update since they haven't been active bloggers. We (Luke, Brett, DeGroot and myself) were all together last night along with DeGroot's girlfriend for Emily Tangen's birthday dinner at a Moroccan restaurant. Luke, Brett, and Dave all see each other on a very regular basis since they all share an apartment. The hang out of choice is Mario Kart for the GameCube at their place, but Luke and Dave are also big into going to a local soccer bar on weekends and do not discourage Brett and me from joining them. Unfortunately, Dave can't do the athletic stuff much these days, because he is in need of knee surgery and will be out of commission for a couple of weeks after the surgery. Please keep him in your prayers.

It looks like I will be the one most likely to depart from the T6 fellowship first. Brett was considering applying to law school, but he decided not to because working to save his boss's job ate considerably into his LSAT study time. I'm currently waiting to hear back from econ Ph.D. programs after applying to 8 of them. None of the schools are in the DC area. I've been asked a few times if I could go anywhere, where would I go, but I'm trying to avoid answering that question until I really know my choices. Plus, if all continues to be going well, I'm hopeful to be taking someone else's opinion into consideration besides my own. Yes, if any of you are thinking it and don't already know it, I have a girlfriend, who I think is very special. I like talking about her, but if anyone wants to hear more, I'd prefer to fill you in further some way other than the blog. I will say one more thing though that when I went out to Chicago to visit her for a post Christmas vacation I got to see Brad Kaspar. It was very encouraging to hear how his missions work in the Czech Republic is going.

Congratulations!!

AAAHHHH!!! Hearty congratulations to our collegue and friend Coye, who passed his qualifying exam yesterday (no doubt with the flyingest of colours!!!)!!! Although both his and Andy's intelligence pale in comparison to my staggering cognitive faculties (after all, the whole concept of instutionalized hazing...er, qualifying examinations... was my doing!!!), his success is yet worthy of high accolades and much praise.

William Butler Yeats

"Never give all the heart, for love
Will hardly seem worth thinking of
To passionate women if it seem
Certain, and they never dream
That it fades out from kiss to kiss;
For everything that's lovely is
But a brief, dreamy, kind delight.
O never give the heart outright,
For they, for all smooth lips can say,
Have given their hearts up to the play.
And who could play it well enough
If deaf and dumb and blind with love?
He that made this knows all the cost,
For he gave all his heart and lost."

Games, boys. Games.

New Website Up

Finally.

www.davidnathanaeljones.com

I hear you Strauss

I won't switch over until everyone has been given the option to switch on their dashboard. Please let comment here and let me know when you have the ability to switch. Once I have Andy, Strauss, Coye, Stephen, Ryan, Adam, and--of course--TEFKAMS (i.e. the folks who post semi-regularly) I'll make the switch with my account.

dave

Today's Second Lesson

Now before faith came, we were imprisoned and guarded under the law until faith would be revealed. Therefore the law was our disciplinarian until Christ came, so that we might be justified by faith. But now that faith has come, we are no longer subject to a disciplinarian. But when the fullness of time had come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, in order to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as children. And because you are children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, "Abba! Father!" So you are no longer a slave but a child, and if a child then also an heir, through God.

librarything

Anyone else have their library organized on librarything? I am still in the process of completing mine. I will post the link soon.

Switching to Blogger Beta

My account wizard informs me that I can now switch my blogs over to bloggerBeta. After I research to make sure that group-blogs will still work the same way, I'm going to do it. We're going 2.0 baby! Consider yourselves told.

-The Managment

TWO YEARS!!! and Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas, everybody... almost. I hope you're all having a blessed advent, anyways. My life at the moment is better than it's been for... well, let's just say I can't really remember things being quite this good. My first year on T6 is, of course, a close second. Maybe a distant second. Medium range? Anyhow, I'm sitting in my appartment, supposedly writing my last paper of the semester (Joseph Conrad, ethics, aesthetics, dangerous books, etc... damn fine work, if I say so myself), and I decided to take a "break" from "writing" and check the old blog. I realized that it's been two years since Dave stuck that first, hopeful post out into the cold vacuum of electronic space. One small step for Dave, we might say. Thanks, Dave. I love this place; I love you guys. I haven't been around much for a the last couple of months, but I hope to show up a little more in the spring. It's great to know that I can find you guys, your lives and your crazy schemes whenever I want to... so thanks everyone who has kept this thing moving along for two, count 'em TWO, trips around the sun. So, I should get back to work, but Merry Christmas, everyone, and a very special Merry Christmas to Dusty, as always.
Peace

Commune musings

Rachel and I were on a road trip to Phoenix a few weeks ago and got into a brainstorming session about the commune-in-planning. Here's a few notes for discussion about what it might actually LOOK like, in no particular order...

- We should be thinking about doing this in phases, something that's already been discussed a little bit. It might be something along these lines... Phase 1) Getting into the same time zone or zip code with outside employment. Phase 2) Intentionally spending more time together in fellowship. Phase 3) Evaluate our gifts and skills; begin to find ways to be co-dependant and supportive of each other. Phase 4) Develop a plan for outward ministry... Etc.

- We may want to have a sort of formal "steering committee", one that would provide initial leadership and help choose a church and community.

- We may want to commit to each attending the same church (of course, not an easy proposition due to variety of faith backgrounds). This would reinforce our internal community, and that relationship would also support the church. Having everyone at different churches might drain our ability to minister to each other if we are also being involved in the local church body.

- Understand that WE would not be a church to ourselves. We don't have the church-planting experience, and I think that we would still need to be a part of a larger body of Christ for accountability and support. It would also be a lot to bite off if we tried to make this community living thing work and start a church at the same time.

- Seek out remote or on-site community advisors (elder mentors) in order to have wisdom from older generation.

- For participation in this community, have a clear agreement on what is expected as well as how and why someone may have to leave. Participation is based on willingness to sacrifice some of your own preferences and comfort for the sake of the body, not based on an enforced commitment.

- At a later phase of the community, we'd have to have an idea of whether there would be financial sharing. This brings up possibility of establishing a formal non-profit status.

- We were thinking that it would be helpful to have some sort of leadership group at a minimum, with input from all adults of the community. Think of maybe a rotating headship, with a president-sort of position to handle day-to-day admin decisions. That position would be part of a committee with the last pres and next pres in order to preserve continuity.

Anybody have comments or other thoughts?

Technology Updates

1. Blogger Beta: too bad we're not able to switch over yet. Tags are nice.
2. Google personized home page: super cool, especially with well ordered tabs
3. Google Notebook: super cool, useful for research
4. Google spreadsheets, docs, calendar, email: googleGooglegoogle
5. YouTube.com

No Links because I'm bored and you're smart enough.

Ok, that's all. You can go back to work now.

Voting Data from the Onion

It turns out, there were plenty of good reasons not to vote this year!! AAHHHH!! I voted 17 times!!!! Vote early, vote often...that's my motto!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Foreshadowing of Dave’s Retirement Years, or, Sarah’s Nightmare

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Wal-mart, but he gets bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here's a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton:

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.

Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-mart:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official one, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO ! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Another Student Story

A long time ago I started a series on funny student stories, and even though it’s been awhile, my experiences of the last 24 hours have made it necessary to resurrect this series for your amusement. Our story begins three weeks ago, when, out of the kindness of my heart, I elected to make an extra credit opportunity available to the students in my professional writing class. I distain waste-of-time extra credit assignments (and extra credit in general—but until you have tenure, you are a slave to student evaluations and must give the little people what they want to some extent), so when I do offer such opportunities, I try to design the assignment in such a way that the student will 1) have to do a fair bit of work, and 2) will learn something in spite of themselves. In this case, I had them find any piece of professional communication and write me a 500-word report analyzing the design of the document. But that’s not the amusing part. Not even close.

This week I reminded them that the deadline was Thursday, and that I would accept the extra credit during our class period (in the morning) or during my office hours (from 10:00-11:30). After 11:30 on Thursday, they were out of luck. Seems pretty clear, right?

So, at 10:00, right at the beginning of my office hours, I get an email from one of my lower-performing students. We’ll call him Stan. Stan writes:

Could you tell me where you hold your office hours. I cannot find TR anywhere on the campus map. Please be very specific.

Now, as Katie pointed out, the very fact that he has no idea where I hold office hours at this late date in the semester speaks volumes. More amusing, however, is the fact that TR is a common abbreviation on this campus for Tuesday/Thursday, with which he must be familiar because our class has met on TR every week of the semester. I should also point out that the very top of my syllabus contains this very clear notice: “Office Hours: TR 10:00-11:30: Art Museum Angles Café and by appointment.” Unfortunately for Stan, I was meeting with groups of students during my office hours and not checking my email. So I reply at 11:30:

Hi Stan,

TR refers to the days of the week (Tuesday and Thursday). My office hours are held in the Art Museum Angles Cafe (the building with the large orange circle in front of it, across from Woodburn Hall).

Stan replies a few minutes later:

Thank you, but your office hours are now over. It would be great if you could wait for me there or let me know where you will be next. I will be checking my email about every thirty seconds. Please respond as soon as possible.

So, feeling bad for this student who has ostensibly been wandering the campus looking for the mysterious “TR” building, I cut him some slack and tell him I’ll stick around until noon to wait for him. But after that, I have meetings and my own work to do, so I’m leaving (I said this much more politely, of course). Stan doesn’t show up, so I eat lunch and head off to the library.

At 1:30, I receive yet another message from Stan:

Wow, I feel like such an idiot. First I try to meet you at the Tuesday Thursday building and now I've been freaking out for the past hour because I sent my last email to the wrong address. Please respond as quickly as possible. I will do anything within my power to get this assignment to you.

He also forwarded that misdirected email for my reading pleasure:

I arrived at the art museum as quickly as I could. My cell phone read 12:08 upon my arrival at the cafe. I realize that you try to stress the importance of punctuality. However, I am going to need more than fourteen minutes to make it from my apartment on East 20th Street to the other side of campus. I do not know how I could have made it to the art museum any sooner. I am sorry if I am inconveniencing you in any way. Please let me know as soon as possible where I can meet you to turn in my extra credit.

That is actually my favorite of the messages, for the way he implies that it is my fault that he waited until the last possible moment to submit his extra credit (how could I be so inconsiderate?). I am also at this point amazed at the level of effort he is putting into submitting this extra credit assignment, which is worth a mere 1 or 2 percent of his grade. If he had put half of this effort into doing his actual work for the class, he would be an A student. But I digress.

For me, the matter is closed. I gave the students 3 weeks to submit the assignment, I made the logistics of submission crystal clear, and I even waited around an extra half hour for Stan. For Stan, however, the game is not yet lost. Apparently, he tried to look up my address (information that is not available to him from the University), and found a listing for me at the apartment complex where I lived more than 2 years ago. I know this because I received an email from the apartment manager around 5:00:

Andrew-

Stan just dropped off some items for you, thinking you still lived at Meadow Park Apartments. We did not catch it until after he had left. He tried to call you but got no answer. Please call him or us as soon as possible so one of you can pick up the items.

Katie and I arrive home at 5:30, and find 5 messages on our answering machine. Who could they be from? You guessed it: my best pal Stan. Now, if I wanted my students to call me at home, I would put my phone number on the syllabus. If I wanted my students to show up at my home (or former home) unannounced, I would put my home address on my syllabus. I do neither, and am starting to get annoyed with Stan. Sometimes, you just need to let it go.

This, however, is not in Stan’s nature. Around 7:30, Katie and I are at home when an extremely loud truck drives up our street and seems to stop in front of our house. It’s dark, and we don’t know who it is. But we have an idea. We are also starting to question the mental stability of Stan (how much do I really know about this guy who shows up late to most of my classes and sits quietly? Is he just a well-meaning, but misguided, kid? A serial killer? An insurance salesman?), and don’t really want to have an evening conversation with him about his late assignment. He knocks on the door. We’re upstairs, so there’s no way he can know that we’re home. We don’t go to the door. He rings the doorbell. We elect to stay put and let him solve his own problem—outside of our house. Then he walks back to his car. The phone starts ringing. It’s Stan. We don’t answer. Stan leaves a message on the answering machine letting me know that he thinks he found my current address and is leaving his assignment in my mailbox. Crazy. Then he drives away.

My advice for Stan: instead of investing several hours and driving all over town for the possibility of a 1 or 2 percent increase in your grade, pour all of that effort into the regular work for the semester, and you’ll no longer be a D student. And don't be so creepy. Teachers don't respond well to stalking. Just a thought.

Alive... if you want to call it a life

I know this will come as a dissappointment to some of you, but, yes, I am still alive (sorry, Ryan). I don't want to subject anyone to a rant/moan/pity-party about how busy I am, so I just won't mention what exactly life is like at the moment. It's good, though. I'm sorry that I missed all you guys at Adam's wedding. Come to find out, Katie has a restraining order out on me (or, to be exact, Andy has an order out restraining me from being anywhere near Katie). Ok, so maybe that isn't exactly true, but it makes a better story than my real excuse.

I don't have much time to post today. I just wanted to jump on, say hello, laugh a satisfied chuckle about the Republicans loosing both houses of congress, tell everyone that I look forward to the days when I can post at least as regularly as TEFKAMS, and then sign off.

By the way, I took the personality test, and it said I was an SOB. Does anybody have any idea what that means? I'm stumped.

Wedding Photos Forthcoming

Are there wedding photos out there yet? I didn't bring a camera.

Personality Questions

Just for fun, and because I had never done it before and had always wondered just what sort of person I am (you’d think by this point in my life that I’d have some idea, but then again, who knows? Maybe I would be more fulfilled as a rock star or a maker of scrimshaw art for tourists. Or maybe I just need to nail down my dissertation topic. Any suggestions?), I took this online version of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator personality test. As with most people, the test largely confirmed some things I already knew about myself, but came with a few surprises. It turns out that I am an INTJ, otherwise classified as a pragmatist or mastermind (sounds impressive, doesn’t it?) It also appears that my personality type is fairly rare, shared by only 2% of the population.

According to the article to which the test results link, “INTJs are perfectionists, with a seemingly endless capacity for improving upon anything that takes their interest. What prevents them from becoming chronically bogged down in this pursuit of perfection is the pragmatism so characteristic of the type: INTJs apply (often ruthlessly) the criterion "Does it work?" to everything from their own research efforts to the prevailing social norms. This in turn produces an unusual independence of mind, freeing the INTJ from the constraints of authority, convention, or sentiment for its own sake.” Some of that is true of me, I think—actually I think the pragmatism toward which I tend is part of the problem that Dave and I have been talking about recently. The short version is this: I can see and appreciate the pragmatics of teaching college students to think clearly and write effectively. This activity involves an obvious social good, both to the students and to the professional and social communities they will eventually join. Therefore, I have no trouble seeing myself doing it for the next 20 or 30 years. I am having a more difficult time understanding the pragmatics of doing research in literature (though Dave’s advice and encouragement has been helpful). Particularly, I want to know how best to use the abilities I have to serve the church and participate meaningfully in the society to which God has called me. Is writing articles that will be read by an average of 2 people the best way to accomplish these things? Is spending hundreds and hundreds of hours writing a dissertation (again, read by few, if any, people not on my committee)? Maybe. Stanley Fish, for example, has said recently in his NYT Blog (and in contrast, though not direct contradiction, to my efforts to find value in my work) that the whole point of academic work is that it cannot, and should not, be justified in anyone else’s terms:

If the point of liberal arts education is what I say it is – to lay out the history and structure of political and ethical dilemmas without saying yes or no to any of the proposed courses of action – what is the yield that justifies the enormous expenditure of funds and energies? Beats me! I don’t think that the liberal arts can be justified and, furthermore, I believe that the demand for justification should be resisted because it is always the demand that you account for what you do in someone else’s terms, be they the terms of the state, or of the economy, or of the project of democracy. “Tell me, why should I as a businessman or a governor or a preacher of the Word, value what you do?” There is no answer to this question that does not involve preferring the values of the person who asks it to yours. The moment you acquiesce to the demand for justification, you have lost the game, because even if you succeed, what you will have done is acknowledge that your efforts are instrumental to some external purpose; and if you fail, as is more likely, you leave yourself open to the conclusion that what you do is really not needed. The spectacle of departments of French or Byzantine Studies or Classics attempting to demonstrate that the state or society or the world order benefits from their existence is embarrassing and pathetic. These and other programs are in decline not because they have failed to justify themselves, but because they have tried to.

Interesting to think about… though it doesn't solve the problem, exactly, of justifying it to myself. But I'll save that for another day.

Anyway, since we seem to be too busy to post much these days, why not spend five minutes taking the online knock-off of the Myers Briggs? We could learn something about each other, and what’s easier to talk about than yourself?

Other highlights from my new-found “Mastermind” self:

“INTJs are known as the "Systems Builders" of the types, perhaps in part because they possess the unusual trait combination of imagination and reliability. Whatever system an INTJ happens to be working on is for them the equivalent of a moral cause to an INFJ; both perfectionism and disregard for authority may come into play, as INTJs can be unsparing of both themselves and the others on the project. Anyone considered to be "slacking," including superiors, will lose their respect…” [Hmmm… reminds me of that song Steve wrote about my Kodon experience]

“Probably the strongest INTJ assets in the interpersonal area are their intuitive abilities and their willingness to "work at" a relationship.”

Other Famous INTJs

Jane Austen
Peter Jennings
C. S. Lewis
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Rudy Giuliani
Donald Rumsfeld
Colin Powell
Lance Armstrong
John F. Kennedy

Fictional INTJs

Gandalf the Grey
Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) [hmmm… is this a good sign?]
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern (Hamlet)

Glossolalia and the Brain

The New York Times published this interesting summary article today on a study published in the journal Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging. In the study, researchers at the University of Pennsylvania took brain scans of several women while they participated in religious activities like singing hymns and speaking in tongues. According to the article, the researchers found “that their frontal lobes — the thinking, willful part of the brain through which people control what they do — were relatively quiet," while they spoke in tongues, "as were the language centers. The regions involved in maintaining self-consciousness were active. The women were not in blind trances, and it was unclear which region was driving the behavior.” In other words, the glossolalia does not come from the area of the brain that typically controls linguistic activity—it comes from somewhere else. Interesting.

Whats does a T6 ECLAD look like?

T stands for tons of fun... S stands for sleep next door. What should a T6 ECLAD look like? Share your vision. If it involves seizing every single government position in the local government, I'm not coming. (Note this is not for place discussions. Logemann has establisted that post already.)

T6 ECLAD in North Carolina

This post is mostly for my friend Steve, who is convinced of (but has little data to support) the idea that North Carolina is a bad state for single people, and thus would make a poor site for the hypothetical T6 Experiment in Communal Living and Discipleship (or T6 ECLAD, for short). “The Triangle” area of North Carolina (comprised of the cities of Raleigh, Durham and Chapel Hill) boasts the many elements vital to the T6 economy: major research universities for the academics like UNC, Duke and NC State; high tech (and high-paying, no doubt) companies for those more practically inclined (for example, those with *ahem* computer science degrees, perhaps?) including Cisco, DuPont, Freescale Semiconductor, GE, GlaxoSmithKline, IBM, Sony Ericsson, and Verizon, among numerous others; several NPR stations; throngs of smart, interesting and available young women (some probably even with southern accents); and inexpensive real estate. You can read a little more (but really not much more) in this Wikipedia article.

Also of interest, the Triangle's population is the most educated in the United States, with the highest number of Ph.D.s per capita. Sounds like an interesting place to me... how about you?

A Link

The following information will be presented in the form of a cheezy radio commercial.

[Cheezy radio commercial music- dee de deee dip daaa!]
"Hi Marshall!"
"Oh, Hi Jenny; wow, you look excited!"
"Well, I just found out about this exciting new website called Library Thing!"
"Library Thing? What's Library Thing?"
"Library Thing is a wonderful online application that allows serious book-owners like me to enter my whole library to my own online database—it's an easy, library-quality catalog!"
"Wow, that does sound exciting, tell me more!!!"
"I'd be glad to, LibraryThing also connects you with people who read the same things; I've already met over FIFTY PEOPLE who love differnt books that I love!"
"Wow! . . .wow wow wow wow WOW!"
"I know! And signing up is easy! Just go to http://web1.librarything.com/ to start your account today!"
"Wow! That's great, I will."
"Hurray!"

[Da dee Daa [pause] Library Thing!]

Goodbye Denny

Resign, Mr. Speaker
TODAY'S EDITORIALOctober 3, 2006
The facts of the disgrace of Mark Foley, who was a Republican member of the House from a Florida district until he resigned last week, constitute a disgrace for every Republican member of Congress. Red flags emerged in late 2005, perhaps even earlier, in suggestive and wholly inappropriate e-mail messages to underage congressional pages. His aberrant, predatory -- and possibly criminal -- behavior was an open secret among the pages who were his prey. The evidence was strong enough long enough ago that the speaker should have relieved Mr. Foley of his committee responsibilities contingent on a full investigation to learn what had taken place, whether any laws had been violated and what action, up to and including prosecution, were warranted by the facts. This never happened. Rep. John Shimkus of Illinois, the Republican chairman of the House Page Board, said he learned about the Foley e-mail messages "in late 2005." Rep. John Boehner of Ohio, the leader of the Republican majority, said he was informed of the e-mail messages earlier this year. On Friday, Mr. Hastert dissembled, to put it charitably, before conceding that he, too, learned about the e-mail messages sometime earlier this year. Late yesterday afternoon, Mr. Hastert insisted that he learned of the most flagrant instant-message exchange from 2003 only last Friday, when it was reported by ABC News. This is irrelevant. The original e-mail messages were warning enough that a predator -- and, incredibly, the co-chairman of the House Caucus on Missing and Exploited Children -- could be prowling the halls of Congress. The matter wasn't pursued aggressively. It was barely pursued at all. Moreover, all available evidence suggests that the Republican leadership did not share anything related to this matter with any Democrat. Now the scandal must unfold on the front pages of the newspapers and on the television screens, as transcripts of lewd messages emerge and doubts are rightly raised about the forthrightness of the Republican stewards of the 109th Congress. Some Democrats are attempting to make this "a Republican scandal," and they shouldn't; Democrats have contributed more than their share of characters in the tawdry history of congressional sexual scandals. Sexual predators come in all shapes, sizes and partisan hues, in institutions within and without government. When predators are found they must be dealt with, forcefully and swiftly. This time the offender is a Republican, and Republicans can't simply "get ahead" of the scandal by competing to make the most noise in calls for a full investigation. The time for that is long past. House Speaker Dennis Hastert must do the only right thing, and resign his speakership at once. Either he was grossly negligent for not taking the red flags fully into account and ordering a swift investigation, for not even remembering the order of events leading up to last week's revelations -- or he deliberately looked the other way in hopes that a brewing scandal would simply blow away. He gave phony answers Friday to the old and ever-relevant questions of what did he know and when did he know it? Mr. Hastert has forfeited the confidence of the public and his party, and he cannot preside over the necessary coming investigation, an investigation that must examine his own inept performance. A special, one-day congressional session should elect a successor. We nominate Rep. Henry Hyde, also of Illinois, the chairman of the House International Relations Committee whose approaching retirement ensures that he has no dog in this fight. He has a long and principled career, and is respected on both sides of the aisle. Mr. Hyde would preside over the remaining three months of the 109th Congress in a manner best suited for a full and exhaustive investigation until a new speaker for the 110th Congress is elected in January, who can assume responsibility for the investigation.